The velvet rage free pdf
The Velvet Rage : Alan Downs :Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read. Want to Read saving…. Want to Read Currently Reading Read. Other editions. Enlarge cover.
THE VELVET RAGE - Barrett Pall
The Velvet Rage : Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man's World
My first attempt to meet these requirements was the following…. The initial problem was a kind of culture shock; the author is a presumably successful therapist and a self-declared gay man. I had to remind myself that his clientele had to be successful enough to be able to afford his services and be in enough distress to actually feel compelled to seek help. This is the constructed narrative of a single therapist based on a sample of mainly, self-selected, relatively affluent gay men in the USA seeking therapy. It is not the definitive or final word on the entire gay experience, no single work of fact or fiction is, or could ever be, the gay experience is as diverse as that of any other human group but it might be one aspect of it with which you, as a therapist, will need to become familiar because these will be the people you are most likely to be seeing, affluent enough to be able to afford therapy and hurting enough to regard it as a necessity though not necessarily American!
A groundbreaking examination of the psychology of homosexuality, why it leads to shame over one's identity, and how to overcome it In The Velvet Rage , psychologist Alan Downs draws on his own struggle with shame and anger, contemporary research, and stories from his patients to passionately describe the stages of a gay man's journey out of shame and offers practical and inspired strategies to stop the cycle of avoidance and self-defeating behavior. The Velvet Rage is an empowering book that has already changed the public discourse on gay culture and helped shape the identity of an entire generation of gay men. With a title that plays on Janet Jackson's epochal LP The Velvet Rope, and its anatomy of unmet desire, therapist Downs's book describes the paradigmatic ways in which early childhood molds the future lives of gay men: scorned on the playground, disrespected by Dad, loved only by Mom until their first sex with men. Through this mechanism of rejection, gay men feel unlovable, correspondingly angry and, he says, driven to heights of creativity and "fabulousness" in addition to shopping addiction and obsessions with fat, muscle and penis size in a bid to distract themselves from their inner shame. For Downs, the only thing that will bring an end to this spiral of torment is, finally, "validation," which produces "authenticity. While many gay readers will fail to recognize themselves here, others will find Downs's logic warming and even generous.